Wednesday, April 06, 2005

A lack of concentration

In the last week I have been a little preoccupied. It’s not just affecting my attendance in the blogosphere, but in the outside world too.

Everything is taking a little more effort than usual. My concentration levels are spent. Driving is a hazard. On the way to work I’m distracted and a little daydreamy. I always pick the slow lane and am often left sitting at a green light with insane drivers tooting me from behind. Once I arrive at my destination though I don’t want to get out of my little automobile, because I know that it’ll be the whole working day before I get back in it to brave peak-hour home.

On the drive home I’m edgy and a little erratic. I just want to get home. I find myself looking for shortcuts and getting pissy with the type of driver I am in the morning. Once I arrive home I’m not calm. I rush around the house, unable to sit and read the paper and drink a soothing cup of tea.

I wouldn’t be able read anyway. I’d get through half an article and then either skip to the end or move on to something with pictures. Forget books. I picked up a cheap copy of Stark by the lovable Ben Elton a couple of weeks ago, in the last week I think I’ve got through (maybe) a paragraph or two.

I can’t sleep either. I’m absolutely exhausted, but as soon as I close my eyes my mind kicks into light speed thinking. There’s no stopping it.

I can’t eat. I want to, because I have this dry taste in my mouth all the time, but as soon as something passes my lips my tummy grumbles something about “you’ve got to be kidding, like I haven’t got enough to think about here!”

Even if I could eat I wouldn’t know what to do. I can’t cook a meal without the distinct possibility of slicing off bits of my finger with my beloved Global knives.

It all sounds pretty dim doesn’t it? Are you worried about me? Can you see a dishevelled Sugar in your minds eye?

You shouldn’t, because it’s got nothing to do with dark clouds and sad skies. It’s more about that all encompassing feeling that you need to be next to that person. You need to be touching them all the time. You need to look at them and see that look of adoration in their eyes, and feel it coming out of yours.

It’s all explosions and happiness and closeness and waiting and feeling and needing and songs and giggles. Really it’s all about love and sharing it with the person that you’ve always wanted to share it with and that can muck around with your concentration.

Phew.

7 Comments:

Blogger la nadine said...

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*vows to live vicariously through sugar forevs*

10:36 am  
Blogger Ukulele said...

Hey! Does this mean what I think it means?

10:47 am  
Blogger Ukulele said...

Coffee. You. Me. STAT!

10:47 am  
Blogger Sherriff said...

I have no idea what that feels like.

11:19 am  
Blogger Husky Nutmeg said...

Clapping hands

Good for you.

More clapping

12:05 am  
Blogger ms fits said...

HOW GOOD IS LOVE??


Waiter, another bottle of your finest pinot gris for the starry-eyed blogger.
xx

4:06 pm  
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